Just going to officiate my brother's wedding.
Cause I am an ordained minister.
My brother's only instructions were, "Short and secular." That seems easy, except it meant I had to write the whole thing from scratch because I'm eschewing any traditional structure, I can't just read some bible verses and be done with it. As someone who looks at marriage as a manmade institution and has trouble imagining the idea of COVENANT FROM GOD/THE ONE/FOREVER it it was important to me to speak honestly but also not be an asshole and ruin my brother's wedding. I think I got it in the end.
Reminder: I am legally able to marry to people but I am not legally able to marry another man in the state I live in. GET IT TOGETHER OREGON.
Once everyone is allowed to marry the consenting adult of their dreams I'm sure I'll get a lot of business. Because I have LOW LOW PRICES!