I had jury duty today, which means a lot of sitting in the jury room waiting to see if you are called to sit on a jury. Besides watching a bunch of crime shows (I'm not sure if this is supposed to inspire us or brainwash us) on the television bolted up on the wall I cracked open The Best American Nonrequired Reading 2005. Flipping through the book I caught George Saunders' name and stopped, I guess Dave Eggers caught on that Saunders was a great living American writer before I did. It was a short story about a bunch of misfit kids and a couple of immigrant widows from Eastern Europe set after World War II. It was nice, but right after that was another piece by George Saunders called Manifesto, a press release from the PRKA. It starts out like this:
“Last Thursday, my organization, People Reluctant To Kill for an Abstraction, orchestrated an overwhelming show of force around the globe.
At precisely 9 in the morning, working with focus and stealth, our entire membership succeeded in simultaneously beheading no one. At 10, Phase II began, during which our entire membership did not force a single man to suck another man’s penis. Also, none of us blew himself/herself up in a crowded public place. No civilians were literally turned inside out via our powerful explosives. In addition, at 11, in Phase III, zero (0) planes were flown into buildings.”
The piece originally appeared in Slate Magazine, you can finish it over there.
I'm joining up.
